Last night, my mother told me she'd finally had a moment when she realized that I, her beloved first child, was almost a quarter of a century. My response, "Umm...yeah...(sigh) I know." Clearly with mixed emotions, I acknowledged that yes, holy crap I am almost 25, when the heck did that happen, but also meant that, more importantly to her, I had my own life and agenda that didn't always accommodate trekking to New Jersey for weekends just hanging with the fam or staying home with my little sister so they could have date night. "But you just look and dress so young," she said. And here was the moment of clarity.
I guess I missed the memo that dictated when certain trends were appropriate and for whom, because I feel like now that I'm finally financially independent but child and husbandless, I should be able to purchase and wear whatever the heck I want. I was recently debating going for the ombre look with my hair and said to the beau, "I just don't want to look seedy, some girls can pull it off, and others just look like they're trying too hard." And his response was,"If the average girl tried half the looks Beyonce rocks, on a regular basis, she'd look a ghetto mess." And I pondered. Living in Philadelphia, where trends evade no budget or age group, I see color blocking, spikes, studs, oxfords, ombre-hair and the likes, some successfully executed, some not so much. So is the issue about ownership, and how well you're rocking those neon accessories? Or is it more so about the stage and direction you'd like to take your life?
I've always valued my ability to go from New England Prep to Corporate Diva to Urban Funky Rocker Chic in a matter of days work, but that was college. Class to Job Interview to Strictly Funk Guest Performance. I guess in college, you're part of a community that has the opportunity to witness such chameleon capabilities, and is less prone to judge you solely on your appearance from a distance, but that's only if they're afforded intimate interactions. So maybe those that only saw me during class hours had one perception of who I was, and those who saw me on the way to Olde City on a Saturday night had a different one.
So now that I'm in the working world, where my end goal is to establish my credibility in a corporate environment, eventually get married and start a family, never knowing who I might meet and where the LinkedIn or Facebook connection might lead - is life now one big interview that I should always at the very least be aesthetically prepared for???
I clearly know my mother's answer to this question. But if that's the case, then the umpteenth closet overhaul is in need. Because as much as I try (I decided this was the year of the grown and sexy like 6 months ago...), effortlessly chic is my current look, emphasis on the effortless. I just can't be bothered to invest that kind of time and come outside looking like I tried that hard. It's just not me. I mean my idea of loungewear consists of an old Penn t-shirt and pair of leggings, but apparently that's juvenile and speaks volumes. Because as I look around the city, "mature" women's active/loungewear consists of Lululemon yoga pants and matching tops and jackets, which will run you about $150 on average per get up. Even with my maturing money, I don't think I'm OK to spend that on something I'm either sweating or watching TV in.
Nonetheless, I know there are more affordable ways to "Get The Look" (insert cheesy smile and jazz hands here), so I'll eventually replace the items I have with more stylishly mature looking ones. But because I'm so tempted to not put in the effort, I have no choice but to remove the temptation. Anything that does not say, "I am an intriguing, classy lady in her mid-twenties that maintains well and takes herself and goals seriously, so you should too" must go. While some may think it pretentious and cliche, it's an aesthetic that must be committed to. They don't say dress for the job you want, not the one you have for no reason. And I personally, think the same goes for all other aspects of your life. While your style may not define you, in a fast paced environment, like the cities us young professionals tend to live in, it can speak volumes.
First impressions are important. What do you think your look says for you, before you have the chance, if you ever do, to speak past it?
xox
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